Feeling pulled in
different poly-directions just now.
I think of all the
people who want to settle down in a little nest of two people only. I appreciate that feeling, but I can’t quite
shut myself off that way. Why am I so
different?
Yet the feeling is
supreme in so many people—though often not without conflict! I watched a film last night about Stephen
Hawking (“The Theory of Everything”) and the relationship between him and his
wife was very touching. At the same
time, they were both drawn to other people.
The movie is about their own relationship—but in a postscript to the
film, we learn that they eventually parted.
Meanwhile, I’ve
been reading a novel by Charles Bukowski (Women)
describing the alter-ego character and his impulsive couplings with multiple
women. I am asking myself what he is getting out of these sexual exploits. I had previously read Andrew Holleran’s
Violet-Quill novel Dancer From the Dance,
chronicling the lives of gay men in New York and Fire Island in the late
1970s. There is much mindless coupling
there, mixed with longings for love and lasting relationships. I could call all these things
“promiscuous”—but should I?
Now, after having
sung a Queen song this morning at Sunday Assembly (a secular congregation), I
am reading about Freddy Mercury and his death from AIDS in 1991 at age
forty-five. Mercury was an extrovert on
stage—but rather and quiet and withdrawn in real life.
So I’m thinking
about all these things. And asking
(again) what it means to be “sex positive.”
And thinking how, for me personally, casual sex with strangers is
unappealing—even if I could succeed in enjoying it.
No comments:
Post a Comment