Friendships—what do I want? What do I need?
Appreciating my wife lately—simply having her around the house; that continuity of companionship. What can we offer one another, through our protective personal walls?
Still—I have my other beloveds; and I wish I could see friends further off, that I’ve never met in person, only online—across the country, across the world. But what do I want?
Not the sex so much—but the affection, the companionship; “spending time together.”
But—if I had one perfect companion—would I be satisfied? If I had just that one—would I need any other?
I don’t think there is a “One”—just various people, various friends that I’m compatible with, that I enjoy being with, that I can care for, that care for me. Tenderness I value; openness; honesty.
I know that my wife cares for me, in spite of our differences. She knows I care for her. She knows I do not mean to hurt her. I know she wouldn’t hurt me. We do care for one another.
That means a lot to me. That’s what I want. Love.